A Quick Guide to Planning Your Own Funeral

Thinking about your own funeral can seem morbid, but planning ahead can help to lighten the financial and emotional burden on your loved ones, as well as ensuring that your wishes are honoured. This guide walks you through some of the key steps to help you create a farewell that truly reflects your life and values.

Why Plan Your Own Funeral?

Relieve stress of family and friends: Making your own choices in advance could relieve your family and loved ones from having to make difficult decisions during an emotional time.
Personalisation: Ensure that your ceremony reflects your beliefs, personality, life story and includes any unique touches that you would like to request.
Finances: Thinking ahead allows you to research the options that are available and the costs of your desired choices.
Make your wishes known: Ensure you have made a note of your wishes so that there can be no confusion or disagreements.

How to Plan Your Own Funeral:

1. Reflect on What Matters Most

Take time to consider your values, beliefs, and any general preferences. These will help to create the basis of what you want your funeral to look like and what you would like it to convey to those who will attend.

2. Decide on Burial or Cremation

Burial: Choose a burial site and type, and consider the related aspects like your headstone and coffin.
Cremation: Decide if you want your ashes scattered, kept in an urn, or kept in a memorial garden. Once again, think about the specifics such as where you would want your ashes to be spread or the type of urn you would like to be kept in.

3. Choose the Type of Service

Traditional funeral: Formal service with an audience and readings.
Memorial service: Held after a burial or cremation, it is usually more flexible and has more options for personalisation.
Graveside ceremony: A simple, dignified gathering at the burial site.
Celebration of life: A more uplifting event focusing on memories, music and storytelling.

4. Select Key Elements

Venue: Religious institution, funeral home, outdoors, or a unique location meaningful to you.
Officiant: Clergy, celebrant, family member, or friend.
Music and readings: Your favorite hymns, poems, or even a playlist of songs that have special meaning.
Personal touches: Photo displays, video tributes, favorite flowers, or a charity for memorial donations.

5. Create a Guest List

This will most likely feel simple and self explanatory, but you should go into as much detail as possible by specifying any roles for people, such as who you would like to deliver eulogies or readings.

6. Create the Plan

Write your wishes: Document your preferences clearly and keep them updated.
Share with loved ones: Ensure family or legal representatives know where to find your plan.

7. Appoint a Funeral Executor

Designate someone you trust to carry out your plans - this could be a spouse, friend, or even your funeral director.

Bonus Tips

Keep your documents (your will, funeral plan, insurance policies) in a safe, accessible place.
Revisit your plan as often as you need and after major life changes, so that it is up to date and relevant to your current desires and circumstances.
Ask your funeral director questions and share any unique requests with them. Their role is to guide and support you.

Final Thoughts

Planning your own funeral isn’t just about the logistics of the day. It’s about creating the final goodbye between you and your loved ones. By making your wishes known, you ensure your life is honoured in the way you want, and that your family is left with clarity and comfort when they need it most.

If you are still unsure where to start, reach out to one of our friendly funeral directors by calling 01424 436 386 or emailing info@towners.co.uk. We’re here to walk you through every step, ensuring your farewell is as unique as your life.